I find solace in documenting my romantic experiences. It helps me move on quickly. While my best friend Keji thinks it unconventional, I’ve mastered the art of using words to heal my heart. This device has been my companion through five breakups and the death of a parent.
Do you read my stories? Would you know I wrote this for you? Does the title give it away? It’s been 5 days since we last spoke. 5 days since you held my hands and left me confused.
We met at Yusuf’s Exhibition. I had been trying to design a new product but couldn’t come up with anything interesting so I decided to go to this exhibition. I had seen a couple of clips on TikTok and it just looked colourful and peaceful. That afternoon, I left my office early and headed to VI.
“Do you want to go to a gallery with me?”
I sent Keji a quick text on Imessage and hoped for a positive response. Her office is about 5 minutes away from the gallery.
“Abeg Abeg Seyi, Some of us have work to do”
I laughed gently because her response was expected. I packed up and went to the gallery alone.
The set up for the exhibition was glamorous. Immediately I walked in, I felt light and knew I had come to the right place. The first thing I did was bring out my camera; took a couple of videos before a man approached me and mentioned a no picture policy.
The gallery wasn’t as empty as expected. A group of girls were sneakily taking pictures in one corner and some people in another corner listening to the gallery attendant.
“Would you like a tour?”
I turned and noticed a petite woman. Her dress had cuts in different angles and the neckline was pretty much absent. I wondered why she decided on such an outfit.
“Uhh sure”, I responded.
“I’m Yusuf’s manager. I normally don’t give tours but I saw you looking a bit clueless and decided to help out. Follow me.”
We walked towards another lady and she said,"Ifeoma, please take her round, I’m heading to the lunch thing that I mentioned earlier.”
She said her goodbyes and walked out. I was slightly disappointed because I silently hoped she was going to handle the tour.
Ifeoma showed me and some other people around and it was a great experience. I went home inspired, ready to work and also curious.
I needed to find Yusuf’s manager.
The first thing I did after settling at home was check the gallery’s Instagram page. I silently hoped she wasn’t one of the “I choose to be mysterious” girls. I didn’t find her on the page but was able to on Yusuf’s page. He had two posts dedicated to his manager and she looked different from the person I saw earlier. No revealing clothes and her hair was always in a bun.
After two hours of deliberating, I sent her a text. I considered throwing my phone in water after that. What if she didn’t respond?
“Hi, I was kind of hoping you were my guide today”
I read the text about 7 times, sent it and turned off my phone.
About thirty minutes later, I stopped working and reached for my phone. What if she responded immediately?
“Are you sure? You looked uninterested.”
“I was just lost in thoughts and I’m really glad I found your insta”
From that moment, we didn’t stop texting until five days ago.
Two days after texting constantly, we went out on a dinner date. You know how you meet someone and you just click? It was instant for us. She is a talker and I, a listener. Feyikemi would go on and on about work, the annoying people at the gallery, Yusuf’s philandering or her nosy neighbour and I would just listen and laugh.
Things were moving really fast and it was as scary as it was exciting. Few days after our date, she invited me for a sleepover. We watched Pretty Woman and spent the night gossiping
Feyikemi knew what to say and when to say. She picked her words sometimes; I figured she also had her reservations about moving fast. We had talked about previous relationships and neither of us was ready to start a new one.
How did someone I met at a gallery become so important to me? Why did the words she said to me five days ago hurt so much?
“Would you like to grab dinner? I want to take you to my pasta spot”
Feyikemi’s text came in as I was packing my bag at work five days ago.
“Hey babe, sure. I’m about to leave the office tho. Should I head to the gallery?”
“Yes please. I’m almost done with Yusuf.”
I immediately requested for a cab and headed to the gallery. Feyikemi was still in the meeting with Yusuf so I had to wait a few minutes to see her.
“Hey love, sorry for keeping you waiting”, Feyikemi said as she approached the waiting room.
I said it was fine, hugged her and we walked to the car park.
“I want to talk about something”
A million thoughts crossed my mind as I opened the passenger seat of her car. Did I do something wrong when I slept over at hers? Was the sex bad? Did I not rinse off soap marks in her bathroom or was I wrong to use her towel?
“What is it?”
“I wanted to say this over dinner but it came out before I knew it. I hope this doesn’t change the way our night would go”
I sighed. Was she about to break up with me? Oh wait, we weren’t even dating.
“Just say it please, you are making me really nervous.”
I didn’t listen to the rest of her sentence. She went on and on about how she was having a great time but was scared of being trapped into a relationship. I was too stunned to speak. I expected this but not so early. I still hoped for more time to spend with her.
20 days in and I was looking forward to the morning texts, the evening facetime calls and random nice gestures. Looking forward to hearing her laugh or talk about the stressful people in her life.
Feyikemi, I am editing this sixty days later. If you have moved on, I don't think I wish your love life well.